Being a Bridesmaid is a delicate balancing act. Making sure the Bride is stress-free is no measly task when you have your own life to live as well. I have experienced both being a Bride w/ Bridesmaids as well as being a Bridesmaid myself so I know first hand just how delicate but important this balance is.
It’s a whole lot more than just showing up to the Wedding a smiling for the Photographer.
As a Wedding Photographer, I’ve seen many Bridal Parties in action. Some have been fantastic while unfortunately, others have been less than stellar.
Being selected to be a part of someone’s Bridal Party is a big deal and a complete honor! I realize that many people just don’t understand how big of a role Bridesmaids play in the Wedding planning process & on the actual Wedding Day. Having a good supportive group of ladies can really make or break the vibe of a Bride’s planning experience.
Have you recently been asked to be a Bridesmaid? Not sure what it takes or how to be a good Bridesmaid? Here are 6 tips to help you be an AMAZING Bridesmaid!
Always Remain #teambride
This may seem like a given but it really encompasses so much! Don’t like the bridesmaid dress/shoe combo she picked for you to wear? Unless it’s going to cause you complete discomfort/pain on her big day, grin & wear it anyway!
Did she mention she was having a hard time making a particular decision or was going to be up all night stuffing invitations? Reach out to help!
Know of anything going wrong on the Wedding Day? Unless it’s totally necessary that she step in to solve the problem, shield her from any and all drama!
Do what you can to help her remain as stress free as possible. I’m sure she will be happy to know her Bridesmaids filtered the drama away from her to allow her to enjoy this once in a lifetime moment. Anything you can do to lend a hand is an incredible gift.
Bring Your BEST Attitude
I know it’s not your Wedding Day, Bridal Shower, Next Day Brunch, etc., but your attitude during these events is crucial! If you are grumpy, complaining about the weather, or just being a pain in the you know what, it can really dampen the mood of the Bride as well as the rest of the Bridal Party & guests. Check your attitude at the door when it comes to wedding festivities you signed up for by saying yes to being a Bridesmaid.
On Wedding Day, one of the hardest/saddest things to deal with as Photographer is a Bridesmaid who doesn’t have the best attitude. She may complain about the posing & drag her feet to get into position, complain about time and worse, fake smile or not smile at all for formal portraits. Not only do I feel bad for my Bride, but I also feel bad that the Bridesmaid(s) don’t realize how their behavior is harming their friendship with the Bride. (She also doesn’t realize how ridiculous she is going to look in those formal Wedding Portraits.)
Get Pampered Too
Girl, you aren’t the star of the show but you are a supporting cast member and you need to look fly as well! Invest in getting your hair, nails & makeup professionally done! You need to slay too ma'am! Not only will you look fabulous in the pictures, but it will provide a nice mood boost for you as well! I’d even suggest scheduling an after Wedding Day massage or facial for yourself. Weddings, while fun, can be long and you are sure to be tired the next day from all the festivities. Treat yourself to a massage for getting the Bride down the aisle happy!
Are you on a tight budget, have health or family issues or that may prevent you from giving what you normally would to the Bride time-wise and/or financially? Be honest with the Bride when she asks you to be a member of her Bridal Party. It may be that she still wants you to stand by her side regardless and this will save you both from hard feelings down the road. I believe the other Bridesmaids should know your limitations as well. For example, if you are on a tight budget, let the other Bridesmaids know before the planning of the Bridal Shower and other festivities. You could offer to dedicate more of your time to the events or if time is your issue, you could offer more financially. This way, you’ve been up front about your limitations & you won’t potentially hurt your friendship(s) by not meeting certain expectations.
Whether it’s your sister, friend or cousin who is headed down the aisle, this is the time of her life she has more than likely dreamed about since she was a little girl! Be excited for her! You know what she loves and all her secrets anyway right? Plan to give her a special token of love on her Wedding Day that encompasses that relationship! Go dress shopping with her! Help her pick out her accessories or even help her pick out outfits for her Engagement pictures! If you see she is stressed, take her out for drinks or go get your nails done together to talk and have a fun, stress free evening! This is your time to bond even more with her. Let her know you love her!
There Is No “I” in Team
Unless you are the sole Bridesmaid, there will be other ladies who mean just as much to the Bride that you will need to get along with during this time. Think of this as a way to forge new friendships! Even if there are ladies in the group you don’t care for, it won’t kill you to be courteous & kind for the sake of the Bride. Balance the responsibilities by pitching in and being an active team player. Don’t take on too many responsibilities that you can’t handle but make sure you are doing your part.
Bottom line: Just be a great friend! Love on her during this time and remember how you would want your girlfriends to treat you during this time if you haven’t made a trip down the aisle just yet. The Golden Rule is key!
Need even more Bridesmaid tips to rock your role?
Create a Wedding Day playlist to keep up the good vibes while getting dressed at the venue
Create a Wedding Day Survival Kit: Include things like safety pins, super glue, bobby pins, tape, rubber bands, a small sewing kit, scissors, WINE, shout wipes & mints (no gum LOL).
If there is any travel involved on your part for the Wedding festivities, book your flights and hotel accommodations EARLY! As soon as you have a date if at all possible, because it is more expensive the closer you get to your date.
You will know before the other Wedding guests when the registry is complete so make sure to get first dibbs one what gift you want to buy! That way you aren’t spending way more or less than you intended by shopping late and all the “good” gifts are bought!
Have FUN & enjoy this time! I’m sure your friend is lucky to have you stand by her side as she says “I DO”!